The Memes

The Memes

If Edgar Allen Poe lived today, his protagonists might have been driven mad by memes, rather than ravens or beating hearts...

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"The Bells"

I.

Hear the sledges with the bells—

 Silver bells!

What a world of merriment their melody foretells!

 How they tinkle, tinkle, tinkle,

 In the icy air of night!

 While the stars that oversprinkle

 All the heavens, seem to twinkle

 With a crystalline delight;

 Keeping time, time, time,

 In a sort of Runic rhyme,

To the tintinabulation that so musically wells

From the bells, bells, bells, bells,

 Bells, bells, bells—

 From the jingling and the tinkling of the bells.

 II.

 Hear the mellow wedding bells,

 Golden bells!

What a world of happiness their harmony foretells!

 Through the balmy air of night

 How they ring out their delight!

 From the molten-golden notes,

 And all in tune,

 What a liquid ditty floats

 To the turtle-dove that listens, while she gloats

 On the moon!

 Oh, from out the sounding cells,

What a gush of euphony voluminously wells!

 How it swells!

 How it dwells

 On the Future! how it tells

 Of the rapture that impels

 To the swinging and the ringing

 Of the bells, bells, bells,

 Of the bells, bells, bells, bells,

 Bells, bells, bells—

 To the rhyming and the chiming of the bells!

III.

Hear the loud alarum bells—

 Brazen bells!

What tale of terror, now, their turbulency tells!

 In the startled ear of night

 How they scream out their affright!

 Too much horrified to speak,

 They can only shriek, shriek,

 Out of tune,

In a clamorous appealing to the mercy of the fire,

In a mad expostulation with the deaf and frantic fire,

 Leaping higher, higher, higher,

 With a desperate desire,

 And a resolute endeavor

 Now—now to sit or never,

 By the side of the pale-faced moon.

 Oh, the bells, bells, bells!

 What a tale their terror tells

 Of Despair!

 How they clang, and clash, and roar!

 What a horror they outpour

On the bosom of the palpitating air!

 Yet the ear it fully knows,

 By the twanging,

And the clanging,

 How the danger ebbs and flows;

 Yet the ear distinctly tells,

 In the jangling,

 And the wrangling.

 How the danger sinks and swells,

By the sinking or the swelling in the anger of the bells—

 Of the bells—

 Of the bells, bells, bells, bells,

 Bells, bells, bells—

 In the clamor and the clangor of the bells!

IV.

 Hear the tolling of the bells—

 Iron bells!

What a world of solemn thought their monody compels!

 In the silence of the night,

 How we shiver with affright

 At the melancholy menace of their tone!

 For every sound that floats

 From the rust within their throats

 Is a groan.

 And the people—ah, the people—

 They that dwell up in the steeple,

 All alone,

 And who tolling, tolling, tolling,

 In that muffled monotone,

 Feel a glory in so rolling

 On the human heart a stone—

 They are neither man nor woman—

 They are neither brute nor human—

 They are Ghouls:

 And their king it is who tolls;

 And he rolls, rolls, rolls,

 Rolls

 A pæan from the bells!

 And his merry bosom swells

 With the pæan of the bells!

 And he dances, and he yells;

 Keeping time, time, time,

 In a sort of Runic rhyme,

To the pæan of the bells—

 Of the bells:

 Keeping time, time, time,

 In a sort of Runic rhyme,

To the throbbing of the bells—

 Of the bells, bells, bells—

 To the sobbing of the bells;

 Keeping time, time, time,

 As he knells, knells, knells,

 In a happy Runic rhyme,

 To the rolling of the bells—

 Of the bells, bells, bells—

 To the tolling of the bells,

 Of the bells, bells, bells, bells—

 Bells, bells, bells—

 To the moaning and the groaning of the bells.

Written By: Edgar Allen Poe, published after his death in 1849

"The Memes"

I.

Read the emails with their memes, 

Classic memes!

Princes from Nigeria and other sordid schemes!

Babies dancing, dancing, dancing, 

Grainy cha-cha CGIs

Lines of hamsters’ endless prancing,

Spongebob squarepants now entrancing

With a theme to bastardize

Epic fails, fails, fails

As the poor, grape lady wails,

As they conquer all your base with poorly-written subroutines

From the memes, memes, memes, memes,

Memes, memes, memes 

From the scamming and the spamming of the memes

II.

See the funny viral memes,

YouTube memes!

Ethernets exhausted by the cyberculture streams!

Just download Adobe Flash,

Watch until your laptops crash,

It’s a trap! End of Ze World!

We love each gag.

It’s the time for PBJ,

Watching Strongbad, Badger Badger, Numa Yei,

Cursing lag.

‘Till professions intervene,

Keyboard cats and Rickrolls now monopolize the screen!

Some are clean,

Some obscene,

Innuendos unforeseen,

Which encumber our machines,

Now a vulture of the culture 

Of the memes, memes, memes,

Of the memes, memes, memes, memes,

Memes, memes, memes 

The diffusing and amusing of the memes.

III.

Scroll through countless snarky memes,

Twitter memes!

Harsh, discordant rancor and political extremes! 

#FirstWorldProblems oft-discussed

As we #facepalm in disgust

“Bye Felicia,” we assert,

As our psyche grows inert

And decays

The cacophonous polemics draw the mind into the mire

With the paranoid endemic, postulations to conspire 

Spitting fire, fire, fire,

In a flame war amplifier

Willy Wonka’s condescension 

#Ermahgerd, the reprehension

From Chuck Norris and old cliches

Oh the memes, memes, memes!

How the vitriol demeans

Is it fair?

Grumpy cats we all adore

Mixed with discourse we abhor

And demotivation poster savoir-faire

So the zeitgeist is consumed

And compiled,

And defiled,

‘Till society is doomed

Yet the comedy redeems,

New profile,

Gangam Style!

So we #DealWithIt it seems

The ad hominem recalcitrance fomenting tribal themes

Of the memes

Of the memes, memes, memes, memes,

Memes, memes, memes, 

In the impulse and the insults of the memes

IV.

Feel the power of the memes,

Modern memes

Damaging democracy and propping up regimes,

Cash me ousside day or night,

Neither gracious nor contrite

Just the autocratic leaders we bemoan!

The despots’ every troll,

Type the doom through which we scroll,

On our phone.

And the usersah the users

Both informers and abusers,

Feel alone

And who trolling, trolling, trolling,

Like sadistic chaperones

Grow addicted from the scrolling

With no patch or methadone

Like a digital Rasputin

Baby Shark and Shirtless Putin’

Clickbait holes

Politician checks the polls,

As he scrolls, scrolls, scrolls,

Scrolls.

Investment sparked from memes!

Buying stonks on hope and dreams,

More investment sparked by memes!

Elon speaks, the market screams

Killing time, time, time 

Of a youthful person’s prime

We’re invested in the memes

Even teens

Killing time, time, time

As we waste our precious prime,

Pepe frogs infest our memes,

All the memes, memes, memes,

Cancel mobs infest our memes,

Killing time, time, time,

With our screens, screens, screens,

There’s a victim, not a crime,

From cajoling of the memes,

From the memes, memes, memes

The controlling of the memes, 

Of the memes, memes, memes, memes,

Memes, memes, memes

The iniquity, ubiquity of memes

Written By: Evan Coopersmith & AE Studio

"The Bells"

I.

Hear the sledges with the bells—

 Silver bells!

What a world of merriment their melody foretells!

 How they tinkle, tinkle, tinkle,

 In the icy air of night!

 While the stars that oversprinkle

 All the heavens, seem to twinkle

 With a crystalline delight;

 Keeping time, time, time,

 In a sort of Runic rhyme,

To the tintinabulation that so musically wells

From the bells, bells, bells, bells,

 Bells, bells, bells—

 From the jingling and the tinkling of the bells.

 II.

 Hear the mellow wedding bells,

 Golden bells!

What a world of happiness their harmony foretells!

 Through the balmy air of night

 How they ring out their delight!

 From the molten-golden notes,

 And all in tune,

 What a liquid ditty floats

 To the turtle-dove that listens, while she gloats

 On the moon!

 Oh, from out the sounding cells,

What a gush of euphony voluminously wells!

 How it swells!

 How it dwells

 On the Future! how it tells

 Of the rapture that impels

 To the swinging and the ringing

 Of the bells, bells, bells,

 Of the bells, bells, bells, bells,

 Bells, bells, bells—

 To the rhyming and the chiming of the bells!

III.

Hear the loud alarum bells—

 Brazen bells!

What tale of terror, now, their turbulency tells!

 In the startled ear of night

 How they scream out their affright!

 Too much horrified to speak,

 They can only shriek, shriek,

 Out of tune,

In a clamorous appealing to the mercy of the fire,

In a mad expostulation with the deaf and frantic fire,

 Leaping higher, higher, higher,

 With a desperate desire,

 And a resolute endeavor

 Now—now to sit or never,

 By the side of the pale-faced moon.

 Oh, the bells, bells, bells!

 What a tale their terror tells

 Of Despair!

 How they clang, and clash, and roar!

 What a horror they outpour

On the bosom of the palpitating air!

 Yet the ear it fully knows,

 By the twanging,

And the clanging,

 How the danger ebbs and flows;

 Yet the ear distinctly tells,

 In the jangling,

 And the wrangling.

 How the danger sinks and swells,

By the sinking or the swelling in the anger of the bells—

 Of the bells—

 Of the bells, bells, bells, bells,

 Bells, bells, bells—

 In the clamor and the clangor of the bells!

IV.

 Hear the tolling of the bells—

 Iron bells!

What a world of solemn thought their monody compels!

 In the silence of the night,

 How we shiver with affright

 At the melancholy menace of their tone!

 For every sound that floats

 From the rust within their throats

 Is a groan.

 And the people—ah, the people—

 They that dwell up in the steeple,

 All alone,

 And who tolling, tolling, tolling,

 In that muffled monotone,

 Feel a glory in so rolling

 On the human heart a stone—

 They are neither man nor woman—

 They are neither brute nor human—

 They are Ghouls:

 And their king it is who tolls;

 And he rolls, rolls, rolls,

 Rolls

 A pæan from the bells!

 And his merry bosom swells

 With the pæan of the bells!

 And he dances, and he yells;

 Keeping time, time, time,

 In a sort of Runic rhyme,

To the pæan of the bells—

 Of the bells:

 Keeping time, time, time,

 In a sort of Runic rhyme,

To the throbbing of the bells—

 Of the bells, bells, bells—

 To the sobbing of the bells;

 Keeping time, time, time,

 As he knells, knells, knells,

 In a happy Runic rhyme,

 To the rolling of the bells—

 Of the bells, bells, bells—

 To the tolling of the bells,

 Of the bells, bells, bells, bells—

 Bells, bells, bells—

 To the moaning and the groaning of the bells.

Written By: Edgar Allen Poe, published after his death in 1849

Grow at Agency Enterprise

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