Consulting Paradigm
We don't need to walk through the valley of the shadow of death, nor the one where we harvest our grain...just the lobby of a corporate hotel.
"Consulting Paradigm"
As I sprint through the lobby of the Marriott West,
I check the time on my phone like some sadistic stress test,
Cause I’ve been building this deck for so long
That half of the budget set for the case is gone,
But I’m expensive and you’d best believe that I’m worth it
With credentials on the wall from schools that you’ve heard of
The Calvin Klein shirt is tartan, with new doc martens,
My home is a crash pad and my desk is spartan
I’m arrogant as hell ‘cause my life is dope
Spittin’ tropes about the creep of the project scope, still
Finding CAC an hour after COB,
I’m fielding pings day and night, circlin’ back at the job site
Been wastin’ years of life in the old consulting paradigm,
Facetime when Zooms suffice in the old consulting paradigm
Got Slack on each device, in the old consulting paradigm
No time for kids or wife in the old consulting paradigm
Accept confabulation and guesstimation
I’m a mercenary arse, upper-caste, the elite,
Selling bids for my soul as I hatch schemes
With prestigious aspirations in the place of dreams
I’m an educated tool on which you can rely,
See the part in my hair and the knot in my tie?
I’m a rock-star geek who calculates CAGR,
Read my progress reviews and see my MECE swagger
Now, beds seem seven million light years away
I’m living life in the sky, day after day
I’m 33 now, but will I sleep before 34?
And if I’m on Xanax, will it show?
It’s the life for me, this B2B,
Can McKinsey raise my LTV?
Still wastin’ years of life in the old consulting paradigm
Firms meet my asking price in the old consulting paradigm
WiFi in paradise in the old consulting paradigm
Quick flights with points entice in the old consulting paradigm
Airpods on the toilet, texting in the shower,
Meeting after meeting, billing by the hour
EBITDA is fallin’, my hotel room is cushy
The engagement is ending, the partner’s gettin’ pushy
They ask me what I think, but my thoughts are in a spreadsheet
I’m out of value-adds, when will they beach me?
And so I text, and so I fly,
And so I work, until it’s time for MBAs or grad school…
Still burnin’ years of time, in the old consulting paradigm
Still workin’ overtime, in the old consulting paradigm
A ladder each can climb, in the old consulting paradigm
A wealthy, wasted prime, in the old consulting paradigm
I’ll QA/QC, each EOD,
So my client sees an SME
All the suites I see, the life for me,
Please deliver me, dear GMC!
Written By: "Weird Ev" Coopersmith & AE Studio
"Gangsta's Paradise"
As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I take a look at my life and realize there's not much left
'Cause I've been blastin' and laughin' so long, that
Even my mama thinks that my mind is gone
But I ain't never crossed a man that didn't deserve it
Me be treated like a punk, you know that's unheard of
You better watch how you're talkin', and where you're walkin'
Or you and your homies might be lined in chalk
I really hate to trip but I gotta loc
As they croak, I see myself in the pistol smoke, fool
I'm the kinda G the little homies wanna be like
On my knees in the night, sayin' prayers in the streetlight
Been spendin' most their lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Been spendin' most their lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spendin' most our lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spendin' most our lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Look at the situation they got me facin'
I can't live a normal life, I was raised by the street
So I gotta be down with the hood team
Too much television watchin' got me chasin' dreams
I'm an educated fool with money on my mind
Got my ten in my hand and a gleam in my eye
I'm a loc'd out gangsta set trippin' banger
And my homies is down so don't arouse my anger, fool
Death ain't nothin' but a heartbeat away
I'm livin' life, do or die, what can I say
I'm 23 now, but will I live to see 24?
The way things is going, I don't know
Tell me why are we, so blind to see
That the ones we hurt, are you and me?
Been spendin' most their lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Been spendin' most their lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spendin' most our lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spendin' most our lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Power and the money, money and the power
Minute after minute, hour after hour
Everybody's runnin', but half of them ain't lookin'
It's goin' on in the kitchen, but I don't know what's cookin'
They say I gotta learn, but nobody's here to teach me
If they can't understand it, how can they reach me
I guess they can't, I guess they won't
I guess they front, that's why I know my life is out of luck, fool
Been spendin' most their lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Been spendin' most their lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spendin' most our lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Keep spendin' most our lives, livin' in the gangsta's paradise
Tell me why are we, so blind to see
That the ones we hurt, are you and me?
Tell me why are we, so blind to see
That the ones we hurt, are you and me?
Written By: Coolio, 1995
